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Near Mint Minus(sm)
The Official Haven for Collectors, Fans, and Plain Old Nerds.
Comic books are vital to the survival of mankind.
As the mightiest task-masters of a sweaty world devoid of sleep, love, or social skills, comics incessantly beat on the drum that beckons us weekly to place small, green bills into the pasty and hyper-knowledgeable hands of the Golfshirt-Tucked-into-Sweatpants-Man, who we call the comic shop owner.
We do so with satisfaction. As members of an addict culture without a cure (except for maturing to adulthood, which we dismissed, like so many Rob Leifield Lithographs), we strongly support the reading, collecting, and hoarding of comic books. We understand that the addiction weighs you down, until you are hopeless - a shell of a man wandering through the dark Gothams and Metropoli of the mind. At Near Mint Minus, we offer you a brief respite from your baleful, nerdish woes. Remember that these reviews are subjective and reflect the views of the NMM staff only, therefore it is incumbant upon you as the reader to read these books, and to judge for yourself, or God himself will judge you.
Read, laugh, cry, gnash, shake fists at your computer, spit, and repeat. Enjoy it while you can. Next Wednesday is closer than you think.
Holy Crap! Check out Week By Week!!!
Near Mint Minus News in Briefs: Robotics and Peblee are moving back, back, back to the Midwest in two weeks. We are not sure if Peblee will be able to catch the new books due out on the 13th of April, or not. Rest assured he will be writing something just to make you roll your eyes and wonder how in the world this site is still on the internet. To those two loyal fans we have, rest assured that poor little Fumanchu will be at the helm steering the course of this venture for about two weeks. Put your faith in Fu, he will make you laugh, no really he will. NO, I'm serious... We now have business cards and T-Shirts available. Remember to checkout the forums page and register. It’s a free forum for: buying and selling comics and comic collections; obtaining your own free nearmintminus.com email account forwarded to an existing account; posting your own reviews and insights; and berating the Near Mint Minus reviewers for their silly, mad-cap antics, and basic, sublevel genius. We are proud of our tireless work here at NMM, and we hope that you are continuing to get a healthy dose of anger, laughter, pomposity, or shame. Maybe you just get epileptic seizures from staring at the half-way artistic backgrounds graffitied with too bright Arial fonted nonsense, but hey, you’re still getting something. Thanks for checking out the site! We hope your jowls ache from the laughter, and that your brains swell with as you are exposed to the ancient arts of verbiage, sarcastic mastery, and stupendous insolence. Check Out the Tommy Castillo Interview!
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This Week's Madness * WARNING * The following reviews are meant to be humorous and may be found to contain sarcasm, dubious associations, groundless opinions, and senseless rebukes for the sole purpose of entertainment (if not yours, then ours) all of which are substances known by the State of California to be harmful to your work-ethic, and may cause malignant tumors of laughter. Caution advised while reading.
Peblee Reccomends: An Absolute Must-Read
If Batman can get better in story than this, I am certain it would out sell Hondas. This book is so perfectly written, and brilliantly illustrated, it is a low-down, dirty shame that due to the creative team being relatively unknown, this book is not going to get the enormous ammount of attention that it deserves. The plot in this tale is simple, but the development and playing of characters is nothing short of brilliance. What's more, your very own mother would enjoy this book if she wasn't too busy wondering why she is still cooking for a son that lives at home, unmarried and unmotivated at age 42. I can't believe you put your mother through all of that, and then you won't even buy her a copy of this comic because you're saving up for that Silver Age replica Iron Man helmet. Fumanchu Reccomends: Mighty Funny Indeed
What did the pirate say when his mom said he should ask that nice winch out? “Avast!” Get it? I’ve asked? Priceless, just like this comic book. This book is to be respected for its old-school style art and its eloquent story writing by Morrison. But for once, Morison’s story takes backseat to his humor involving bands of hobos that have purloined subway trains and used them to pilfer the tunnels of fortune ‘neath the gritty streets of the big apple. Pirates for true with swords, knives, and awful hygiene. Upon their night frigates, they unfurl their black sliding doors and hoist the main lever to set terror upon the underground. This idea is so novel that I must insist you read it, lest I clap you in irons and throw you in the brig (the corner that the crazies urinate in). Check out Ultimate Heroes today! Are you looking for a new comic shop? That old shop of yours never have those elusive books that aren't best-sellers, but are your personal favorites? Want to try a whole new concept? Check out Ultimate Heroes Comic Shop. Only a small minority of folks are able to live in the heart of the country, and only a few of them get the pleasure of meeting George - a very different kind of comic shop guy. George pulls into his shop the most extensive line of new comics every week! He also carries games, posters, art, and the most high-grade backissues that we have seen. If you are tired of finding back-issues that look like they were read in the bathtub, chewed on by a vulture, or used to wipe after a night of nachos and beer, then your solution is a click away! |
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All writings are copyright © Near Mint Minus 2005
Near Mint Minus and nearmintminus.com are (sm) 2005 Matthew C Mahan.
X-Men, Avengers, Ultimates, and all other above-mentioned titles, characters, their distinctive likenesses, and indicia are ™ & © Marvel Comics and Marvel Characters Group, Inc., Likewise Batman, JLA, and all characters related to the DC Universe are ™ & © DC Comics, and or Time Warner Inc. All other titles,characters and images are the property of people who are NOT you, so please choose wisely before using them to decorate your website. This site is only meant to entertain and promote comic-readership, is unofficial, and is neither authorized nor endorsed by Marvel Comics or DC Comics or any other publisher.