Inane Discussion Six:

"Lads, Wings, Wierdos, and a Superman that Everyone Can Love"

Peblee: Let’s start with Young Avengers. What’s your take on it?

Fumanchu: I thought it was pretty cool. I mean, it seems to be the normal “young-teen” combination, but you know. At the end, though, it kind of threw me for a loop.

Peblee: I agree. The end is equivalent to the scene that New Avengers waited three issues to put out: the comic lover bait. Of course, with Wolverine on the covers, New Avengers can last three issues without giving you a plot twist, but I really appreciate the efficiency of the team at Young Avengers.

Fumanchu: Yeah, I don’t consider the first two issues of New Avengers to be real issues, just failed prototypes.

Peblee: I consider them falderal.

Fumanchu: Yeah, they are just unimportant, I think.

Peblee: I have just a few complaints about this one: the first is that too much time was spent inside the Daily Bugle. It got really annoying, and I started to think I was reading “The Pulse.”

Fumanchu: I thought it was really annoying that the guy’s name was Iron-Lad.

Peblee: Yeah, until I found out that he’s from the 13th century, and then “lad” seemed okay.

Fumanchu: Of course! The world hadn’t advanced to cool names, yet.

Peblee: Right. They were in the Dark Ages of nomenclature. Cool names weren’t to arise until the 1600s or 1700s. Anyway, there are two other things that I need to get off of my chest: 1. The Hulkling is dumb-looking, not big, and way too stable. I mean he is a teenager, for cripes sake. He should be more unstable than Bruce Banner.

Fumanchu: Yeah, and he also never turns into a normal guy. He is permanently Hulklingus.

Peblee: Easy, there. But, yeah, a teenager has so many crazed, hormonal problems. He should be changing from sobbing, heart-broken fool - to raging, psychopathic, anger-nerd. All in all, a teenage Hulk should be less stable than an adult Hulk. On another note, I enjoyed the fact that their second mission, the one featured in the comic, was a complete flop.

Fumanchu: Yeah, they were so inept. They also displayed that whole first and second in command rivalry that is so essential to every teen group comic.

Peblee: Don’t you think that is appropriate? I mean, I think they should, and were, teen-ish since they are teens. Wait, the last thing I had to mention which was annoying to me was that Lieutenant America uses US Military insignia-shaped throwing stars.

Robotics: I liked the throwing stars. I thought they were cool. It is different than a shield. Maybe later he will get a shield to go with them. Using them both, he will be impossible to defeat.

Fumanchu: How come the Asgardian has wings on his helmet?

Peblee: The Asgardian?

Fumanchu: Yeah – Thor-Lad.

Peblee: You didn’t like the wings on the helmet? I thought they were cool.

Robotics: I think it’s weird, all those guys having wings on their helmets.

Fumanchu: When he flies around, does he use those wings?

Robotics: Yeah, they flutter really, really fast to keep him up.

Peblee: Fumanchu, your overall take on this book?

Fumanchu: Um, I think that it is going to be an important series, at least for a while – pretty mainstream. I think it has potential, but I think it will probably not ever be great, but better than most.

Peblee: Robotics?

Robotics: I like it because it has an 80’s style feel to it. It is lighthearted, the humor isn’t stupid, and it has a great twist at the end. I like that the plot isn’t over-serious, which tends to make books corny. However, I don’t like “lad”, and the Hulkling needs a makeover. He looks like a bodybuilder version of Michael Jackson.

Peblee: My take is that, as far as it becoming great, it has real potential as a magnet for great artists, writers, and creators. It can be a hot item.

Fumanchu: But the teenage clichés are going to keep it from being great, in my opinion.

Peblee: Well, Teen Titans is a major success whose focus is on teen age clichés.

Fumanchu: Yes, and it is really good, but not great. It can also be fun, if it continues on into the triple digits, for collectors.

Peblee: I think it can also be a great spot for the introduction of new characters to the Marvel U.

Fumanchu: So, how about Breach?

Peblee: Breach. Excellent. Breach is not only the best new creation in DC, but I have to say that I was shocked by the peculiarities, and the depth, and interesting nature of this second issue. I totally expected it to be more cut-and-dry, superheroish stuff.

Fumanchu: But he’s not even a superhero, at least not yet. Right now, he’s just a guy with a tragic destiny.

Peblee: No matter what, this is character is not going to be left on the sidelines.

Fumanchu: But, he could be a guy that just deals with his own stuff and doesn’t get involved with the rest of the DCU.

Peblee: But, it’s impossible for him to remain outside of, say, the perception of the JLA. I mean, can’t you see him trying to kill the guy that sabotaged him, took his life away – including his wife and kid, and then Batman showing up and being like, “Zanetti! Stop! Think about what you’re doing. The people of the world need you on their side. Don’t become a criminal, don’t become…like him.” Here, Bats would look at the cornered prey with a look that says you are the lowest of the lowdown losers. Can’t you see it, Bats playing the Captain America card?

Fumanchu: I’m not saying that I can’t see it, just that this story may not go along the lines of the other stories in DC.

Peblee: Yeah, he could just walk the fence – never being hero or villain…Oh, man, The Herdsman! He was so cool. I don’t think he was all evil and stuff, but more like that guy Lenny, from Of Mice and Men, who killed things on accident because he was just too strong. The people in this issue were just too fragile to be handled by The Herdsman.

Fumanchu: I think that while he wasn’t out for death and destruction, he considered the people so unimportant that he killed them just because; like stepping on a bug. Anyway, how can Breach ever defeat The Herdsman if The Herdsman can just come back to life? Obviously, he’s not bound by normal life and death.

Peblee: I don’t know, but I think that we can assume Breach has the same ability to come back. I mean, the personality that arose in The Herdsman was obviously not the young shepherd-boy’s original personality, and I think Breach is experiencing his mental problems because he is dealing with pandeminsional personalities. They are both like people from two different dimensions, you know?

Fumanchu: Did you see what they did to that facility? It is my opinion that this “Breach” will be more powerful than anyone in the DCU.

Peblee: Yep, on par with Supes and Green Lantern.

Fumanchu: I think he’ll be stronger than Superman.

Peblee: I just want to see him meet Spectre. I mean, he works personally for God, you know? … Let’s talk about Majestic.

Fumanchu: He’s traveling six times the speed of light.

Peblee: For four months – cool. Also awesome: while all those civilizations are trapped in ice or whatever, part of the massive ship is breaking down, so the containment stuff is decayed, and some of those bug-bots are sterilizing everything. That was well done.

Fumanchu: Yeah, and obviously some of the creatures escaped and survived.

Peblee: Yeah, doesn’t it make it so much more complex?

Fumanchu: It makes me think that he may be right, and whoever designed that ship is long gone, and the machines and robots are still just trying to do their jobs, but at the command of no one.

Peblee: I am really impressed. Breach 2 and Majestic 2 are the best second issues of a comic series that I have read in a long time. Both surprised me big time.

Fumanchu: So, we done?

Peblee: I guess. Why weren’t we funny this week?

Fumanchu: Your mom goes to college.

Robotics: "Lad" sucks.

Fumanchu: Yeah, no one should be allowed to be called "lad" unless they're Scottish, like, "The Scottish Lad!"

Peblee: I quit.