Peblee: So, what do you want to talk about first?

Fumanchu: I don’t know what do you want to talk about?

Peblee: You mean I get to go first?

Fumanchu: Well….

Peblee: Excellent! Then I will start by saying that Conan 12 –
Did you just hang-up?

Fumanchu: If I did, why would you ask me?

Peblee: Okay, Conan 12 –

Fumanchu: Can you ask someone a question after they’ve hung-up the phone?

Peblee: CONAN 12 was awesome. The art by Nord and Mandrake is incredible, and the colors are perfect.

Fumanchu: There were good scenes of pandemonium.

Peblee: The story about the warrior chick and that crone-ish witch lady was hard core awful, heinous and depressing.

Fumanchu: You know what pandemonium means?

Peblee: Hard core awful, heinous and depressing?

Fumanchu: It means “everywhere demons” and so, some of those frames could literally be described as pandemonium.

Peblee: Yeah, some of those “woman-taking” scenes shall we say?

Fumanchu: Some of the twisted, brutal, dirty scenes? Though I love his writing, I definitely think that Busiek has a twisted, brutal side. Not saying he’s a terrible guy, just that he is, you know –

Peblee: Awesome?

Fumanchu: Yes. And the fight between Janessa and Conan was very well done – well drawn.

Peblee: It was cool when Conan realized that she was fighting for blood. He just clocked her. First time she had ever been hit by a man.

Fumanchu: I like that her top covered the top-half of her breasts rather than the standard bottom-half.

Peblee: Yep, reverse cleavage. We should note that there isn’t enough women that go for the upper boob-cover to release the lower boobs.

Fumanchu: Yes. Style today has lost all decency. The lower-half – you can show that to anyone. Not that dirty. But, all those women showing off the upper-half, well that is just degrading.

Peblee: It is, Fu. I think that the FCC has full rights to nab people who want to show too much upper-boob. The feminists need to catch on to this idea because all that this lower-boobage seems to show is that you are as powerful as a powerful guy like Conan. Really it is an equalizer.

Fumanchu: It is a symbol of balance. I think if you’ll remember Hercules often bears the lower man-boobs.

Peblee: Hercules?! Why are you paying attention to Hercules’ man-boobs? Explain yourself!

Fumanchu: …..Research….You know, they could just wear no shirt. Conan wears no shirt because he’s so muscular that every time he stoops to pick up a quarter his shirt rips off. . So, all of his money goes to shirts.

Peblee: This is going nowhere.

Fumanchu: Okay then. What did you think of Araña?

Peblee: Let me tell you exactly what I think of Araña. I like that it didn’t start as an origin story. Instead, it started in the middle of a larger story. I also think that that guy Miguel is totally mysterious and way cool, but for some reason he feels the need to hang around with a teenage girl.

Fumanchu: Most powerful men do.

Peblee: Maybe it’s like a mid-life crisis. Anyway, I like the depth they gave the story by putting the historical references, like: “Since the dawn of time spiders have been killing you.”

Fumanchu: Yeah, there’s obviously a back-story.

Peblee: Yes, obviously since they didn’t start at the beginning…But, on another note, I have to say that I get really sick of all the smart-aleck quips.

Fumanchu: Yeah, all in all it is a cool story, but the dialogue is a little awkward at times. I mean, smart-aleckness is good in some cases, but what people try to do at times, and especially people who write Spider-Man, is build the entire comic around the smart-aleck stuff.

Peblee: I know, but I don’t think that is the case here. On a side note: Remember when Miguel says “Dim.” and the whole world goes dark?

Fumanchu: That rocks.

Peblee: It’s so cool. If this guy can do all sorts of things like that, then is he going to become a major player in the Marvel U?

Fumanchu: I don’t know. Now, a question: Why does he need Araña? Oh, and those Wasp guys were cool. They were like the “Crazy 88.”

Peblee: They reminded me of the “Turks” from Final Fantasy VII.

Fumanchu: Man, FFVII rocked.

Peblee: Yes. Yes it did. We should, though say something about the art in Araña. I will say that it was definitely good. Robotics (the newest staff member of NMM) commented though that in almost every frame Araña is in a “Mount Me” position.

Fumanchu: That’s true She is always crouching down low.

Peblee: Yeah, with her butt up high. That’s actually the best way to get shot in the butt. Wait. What is the purpose of the goggle-glasses, and why does she need them when she becomes Ultra-Man? And how is that fish-head supposed to look like a spider? It’s like “The Darkness” turns her into a seahorse or something.

Fumanchu: Do you have “Amazing Fantasy”?

Peblee: #@$*! Something more to buy.

Fumanchu: A word to Avery [writer]: Tone down the smart-aleck comments. And now, a word to my prosecutors: I thought that was the men’s restroom. If they want to make the distinction clear, the sign-woman should have more of a skirt.

Peblee: Do you think that when Araña becomes “of-age” she will don the upper-boob cover?

Fumanchu: Why should she wait to be of age when the upper-boob cover is just plain classy?